Sagan om Ringen.
Tati: Jag behöver inte slösa tid på att läsa den. De bara går och går och jag vet hur det slutar.

Professor Smith: I've got a nice big OED sitting on my desk. It's there, gathering dust. It's what's referred to as "shelf candy".

Jacob: I'd quite like to get a tattoo on my body too.
Sophie: (...) Where else would you get it?
Bell: On your mind.
Jacob: Outside your body.
Sophie: I believe that's called "a book".

Mitch Albom.
Bell: Jag hatar ju honom. Med en brinnande passion.
Tati: Jaså? Nej, jag tycker "hata" är ett lite starkt ord...
Bell: Ja, jo. Jag är väl mest apatisk. Men det är en brinnande apati.

Concerning Charles' cat Amata.
Emma F: She loves lying around pretending to be a spondee.

Bell's advisor of studies.
Bell: He's read Hamlet in Persian. I'm quite impressed by that.
Rachael: Well I read your face in English and it's not pretty.

Translating the phrase "male sana" from the Aeneid.
Mr. McOmish: It means "in bad health", so basically "Then, pur wee Dido who wasn't quite right in the hid, said..."

Pi: Nu när du citerar Shakespeare känner jag att det är dags för mig att gå och lägga mig.
Bell: Du är inte imponerad?
Pi: Du hakade inte på när jag lekte med sjalen innan, så nej.
Bell: Alltså, det är ju en viss skillnad kulturellt mellan att citera Shakespeare och leka med en sjal, men du kanske inte uppskattar det.
Pi: Säg det till muslimerna.

Having just watched The Secret of Nimh, Bell hands Pi the novel.
Pi: Ah! Si! I see this before! Is, eh, book!

The lecture aid on American literature for some reason has a picture of Sarah Palin on it.
Mr. Coyle: My apologies for sticking the Antichrist on the handout, I don't know why I did that.

"Batter My Heart" by John Donne.
Mr. Newell: This is a compressed, straitjackety poem.

Mr. Newell: Donne loves roleplay. He loves wearing different hats.

Hamlet: "Ay, madam, it is common."
Professor Cronin: Firstly, he's accepting, "Yes, it is common", second, "You're a whore."

Dr. MacKenzie: Quite like the old BBC, which was run by sensible people.

Bell: I didn't find The Cripple Of Inishmaan very funny.
Diarmid: I did. When cripple boys get beaten up with lead pipes, I can't help but laugh.

Bell: Varför blixtrar det?
Pi: Det är när Gud... rakar sig... blixtrar Tarzan... Gammalt djungelordspråk.

Pi: Är det inte tur att blixten alltid träffar rätt?

Bell: "Alltså, vi kan ju inte bara kalla det Fejs, vi behöver nåt som får det att låta mer intellektuellt. Jag vet! Bok!"

Bell: Bilddag-book.

Mark: I'm not going back to English Literature. Not after Spunk Woman.
Bell: Yeah. She did use the word "cock stand".

Jonfen: You should read När Änglar Dör too. Swedish book. Skitbillig. It's good as hell despite being in Swedish.
Bell: It's on my bucket list.
Jonfen: I have a suggestion for improvement.
Bell: Whut is't?
Jonfen: REMOVE ALL BOOKS NOT PROPOSED BY ME.

Professor Cronin: I'm surprised that more parents don't kill their children, actually. Aren't you?

Jane Austen's use of irony.
Dr. Randall: And what is irony not? It's not rain on your wedding day, or a free ride when you've already paid. That's just inconvenient.